28 years old, introverted, sensitive, delicate, longing for a different life: Is it difficult?

People who don’t optimize their personality often miss out on opportunities for growth.

01

The first time I saw Momo (pseudonym), I faintly felt a faint melancholy breath exuding this girl.

Momo is tall and thin. She wore a linen skirt with a blue print on a creamy white background. Her hair was scattered on her shoulders, and her eyes were clear and simple.

Looking at Momo’s resume, she has graduated with a business English major for almost five or six years, but the bumps along the way have made her very anxious.

Momo’s first job was sales in a foreign trade company. In less than three months, Momo felt that she could not bear the performance pressure of sales work, and she always felt that opening a conversation with strangers was the same. It was a super embarrassing thing. She felt that her personality was not suitable for sales, so she wanted to change to a quieter job.

Under the arrangement of his family, Momo’s second job was a document clerk for a construction company.

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According to the description of Momo, information officer for the job need to be very careful, otherwise the Yi Ge typos, entire data to be redone, to re-take process, what needs to signed and sealed.

It is the communication between himself and the supervisor that makes Momo feel the pressure.

For example, the supervisory committee told her what she wanted, and Momo, as a data officer, naturally had to help him get it done; but in many cases, because the data officer needed to enter the site, the supervisor would ask the data officer to talk to the chief engineer.

In the latter case, it’s nothing to the clever and clever information staff; but to Momo, who is nervous when talking to people, he doesn’t know how to gently refuse, so he has no choice but to bite the bullet and agree, but When speaking, he always appears incoherent and incomprehensible, and is often criticized and pressured by the chief engineer and supervisor.

Momo still resigned.

After resigning, Momo went through several different jobs, but all ended in failure without exception.

Seeing that I was approaching 30 years old, and then dangling like this, when would I be a head?

Where is the job that suits you?

02

From the mood and narrative style revealed by Momo during the consultation process, Momo’s personality traits can be described as follows——

Introverted, sensitive, delicate, full of inner talent, longing for a different life, can’t help criticizing, unable to bear the pressure, likes to be free and loose, always inexplicably sad and melancholy, a floating leaf, a white cloud, and even in front of a flower child, can make them stood for some time, lead to a different kind of emotion and insight ……

However, looking at the commercial society, if the family is not rich and does not have enough material foundation to guarantee, people with this kind of traits will encounter all kinds of dissatisfaction and ups and downs in the face of reality.

In the workplace, this kind of people often show surprising “naive”; and this kind of “naive” can seem a bit naive.

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1. Lack of goal orientation in doing things, often not distinguishing priority

Take Momo’s job as a course consultant as an example.

In this job, Momo will inevitably encounter some more difficult customers. They will ask various questions at the beginning. After Momo has answered them one by one, they will start to ask whether they can offer discounts. At this time, there are Experienced salespersons will adopt a “cold treatment” approach, such as telling the other party that they can help inquire about the recent preferential policies, etc., wait two or three days, and then see if the other party is urging to determine whether this person is an “intended customer” .

If the other party’s intention is not strong, it will be difficult to make an order if you give a discount. On the contrary, the more you give the discount, the more the other party will “get an inch” and the order will be delayed.

Therefore, the root cause of Momo’s frustration in the sales field lies in the inability to grasp the degree of customer intentions, and devote too much time and energy to these “difficult” but “intentional” customers. Missed the opportunity of real intentional customers, the performance is naturally poor.

2. Lack of self-expression awareness, subconsciously waiting for leaders to actively discover and approach themselves

In the past career experience, Momo still has a misunderstanding, that is, never actively communicate with the boss, but hope that the boss can take the initiative to discover and get close to him.

In Momo’s cognition, it seemed that the boss should see it in his eyes.

But the problem is that because Momo does not distinguish between priority and priority, he often invests a lot of energy and time in places that are not worthwhile, and cannot produce results in his work, so naturally he cannot be appreciated by the leader.

Under such cognition and behavior, Momo feels bad at every job.

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3. I don’t know the limits of my own abilities, and I don’t know how to take advantage of it, let alone ask colleagues or leaders for advice

Momo always tends to take care of the matter alone, but often, her ability is not enough to handle the matter, and even leads to the opposite ending.

For example, once, a customer who had just signed an order for a few days just came to ask some detailed questions with the timetable. Momo told her that these questions were not important. She said that many customers got the timetable without asking any questions.

The client became angry on the spot. She felt that Momo’s answer was too important to avoid the importance, and that the agency was unprofessional, and she clamored for refunds.

This incident caused trouble to the leadership, and the leader reassures him for a long time and has not recovered the end of the refund. Naturally, he punished Momo accordingly.

03

In all these cases, Momo will encounter similar difficulties in basically every job. It is either poor work or blocked interpersonal relationships, which means that there is a huge gap between Momo’s ability and relationship.

You said, what kind of living environment is suitable for people like Momo? What kind of work can Momo circumvent these so-called “shortcomings” and get a good experience?

I guess your answer is, kindergarten teacher?

But the problem is that Momo has great desires and ambitions. She hopes that she can realize a life of financial freedom as soon as possible…

Therefore, for professionals such as Momo, if they want to develop in the company, the first problem to solve is adaptation; and if you want to solve the adaptation problem fundamentally, you must start with optimizing your personality.

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1. Set goals: what kind of person do you want to be?

For Momo, the first thing that needs to be put down and discarded is unreasonable expectations.

For example, you want to feel safe and eager to make money, you do not want to take risks and pressures, and you want to live a rich life…

We must not only pay attention to the “good” of a job, but also evaluate the risks and costs that may be borne behind it, weigh the “profits and losses”, see what costs you can bear, and appropriately lower your expectations of yourself when necessary. Develop practical plans and goals.

2. Adaptive thinking: replace negative thoughts with positive self-affirmation

Similar Momo this reason people do not know how to ask for help in the face of difficulties, because in their thinking, find someone to help busy seems to be incapable of performance.

But the fact is just the opposite.

Everyone is not omnipotent. This is the root of teamwork. If you know how to ask for help and borrowing, you can beat yourself through hard work. Not only can you improve efficiency, but you can also observe and learn from others’ ways of doing things, so that you can grow faster. .

3. Enrich your mind, read more and think more

Mr. Yang Jiang said in a very subtle way: “Your problem is that you read too little and think too much.”

In the eyes of people like Momo, it is difficult to understand why some people do things efficiently, as if they can grasp the core of the problem at once.

In fact, excluding a very small number of people with unusual talents, most of them spend a lot of time and energy studying business after work, reading and thinking constantly, there are many problem-solving models and ideas in the brain, and these are all Compound interest brought by reading.

4. Stress and energy management: learn to face pressure and criticism

In the process of work, pressure is unavoidable, and how to treat criticism objectively is a key lesson for professionals with such characteristics to practice.

In this world, there are people who are rich in emotions, and naturally there are people who are rational and cold: in the latter’s eyes, only by pointing out the other party’s problems can they really help the other person grow up.

For professionals like Momo, it is best to get out of their subjective world as soon as possible, to have more contact with the real world, and to appreciate different people and things, instead of hiding in their own world when encountering pressure and frustration. Curled up inside.

Because, for people like Momo, more important than choice is to optimize your personality: only by improving your personal realm and the perspective of looking at problems can you stimulate your potential and creativity, and make yourself what you never thought of before. The kind of achievement you dare to think of.

above.

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Posted by:CoinYuppie,Reprinted with attribution to:https://coinyuppie.com/28-years-old-introverted-sensitive-delicate-longing-for-a-different-life-is-it-difficult/
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